A sigh of relief

Home sweet home. A year of stress and turmoil for our family is coming to an end...but it's not over, as we readjust to being together again and cope with our respective experiences. Robert had the incredible challenge of being a single parent, I had the distance too, having to separate from my family and their lives for too long. We have to find our way again...but it's such a relief to be home, really home, and know that this is all that matters for a while.





After we left KAF (boarding that plane was a GREAT feeling!) we spent four beautiful days in Cyprus, spent eating too much amazing food, sleeping in a king-size bed that felt so enormous, watching the ocean from my balcony, drinking a little wine (okay a lot), swimming in the outdoor hotel pool, getting a massage at the spa, eating more amazing food, travelling the island..the contrast to being at KAF for so long made it feel a little surreal, but it was a fantastic way to have some respite to prepare for jumping back into home life.




This last photo shows one of the two CF-18s that escorted us into CFB Trenton...a crazy welcome back to Canada; the pilot thanked us on behalf of the Chief of the Defense Staff, and they flew on either side for about half an hour. In rather shocking contrast, five of us were later quite unceremoniously dumped at Ottawa International Airport at midnight, to wait for our 0645 flight to Halifax...it was a little disappointing to be sleeping on an airport bench in my tan uniform, already 24 hours on the road, so close to home yet still so far.

Last night at supper, Julia created a story that will be told in our family for a long time to come. Yesterday I went to the grocery store, thrilled with the vast selection of food, and cooked dinner for the first time in six months...as we ate Robert said "Isn't Mommy a good cook?!" - when the kids both agreed, he asked "is Daddy a good cook?" The answer was a unanimous "NO", so I asked "what kind of things did Daddy cook for you?" and without hesitation Julia replied "Kraft Dinner, and milk!" Then, after a short pause, she added "...and chocolate cake." We laughed so hard...of course he says they hardly ever had Kraft Dinner, but I'm wondering who to believe... :-)

Six months sure went by quickly

Waiting for our flight...the weather is getting nicer here already and it is going to be a big shock to the system to be back in Canada with the frigid temperatures I've been hearing about. We sat out on the patio on the boardwalk this afternoon in t-shirts (pants too, but it could've been shorts), and it was so nice. I think the weather in Cyprus will be quite nice too, maybe not warm enough to swim in the ocean but oh well. We can still sit on the beach...

In Halifax a week today!!! Can't wait.

Thinking of everyone at home,
Lindsay

The End is Near

It is truly hard to believe that six months has passed since I started this blog!! Today we finished most of our handover to the NEW team...see the above photo...now it's feeling real that WE'RE DONE. Three more days and we're outta here!

But one of the reasons why it'll be sad to leave is our new friend Crystal, AKA MCpl Crazy, who arrived a couple of weeks ago (at the far right in the second photo) She is a dental tech who is here doing sterilization stuff for us and assisting the oral/maxillofacial surgeon whenever someone is unlucky enough to break something in their face. She loves Lucky Charms and has inspired old school dance-offs in the central sterilization room...she SO should have been on Roto 2 with us. Anyway, I'm sure she will have just as much fun with Roto 3, although let's face it, I don't think there's much chance she'll have them doing the running man and singin along with Salt n' Pepa in the back...

It honestly feels like such a short time ago that we were arriving here, going to the range having had no sleep and nearly passing out from wearing all our gear in 50 degree heat, getting a tour around camp and still having no idea where we were, living in the horrible BATs, learning our way around the OR, then getting shocked into reality when we received our first patients - a 3-year-old boy with a skull fracture and part of his scalp torn off when he was dragged by a car, a Canadian soldier with a terrible head injury, another with a broken leg, and it just kept coming and coming. These and other images will be in my head for a long time to come. The 12 year old boy who died from complications of his burns, the Afghan guy who walked in covered head to toe in blood from a gunshot wound to his lower jaw, complaining "it hurts!", all the guys involved in the A-10 strafing incident on September 4th, the bicycle-borne suicide bombing on September 18th, the eleven burn patients on October 3rd. The British soldier who came in hardly able to breathe with shrapnel in his neck, his blue eyes wide in panic. Our little sweetheart Nazia, who finally went home to her mom, recovered from her burns.

But there has been so much fun too - I can see one of our longtime patients, Haroon, from his bed with his broken leg, singing an Afghan song at the top of his lungs with Justin, one of the med techs, dancing around the ward. Robin, our ICU nurse from Detroit, trying to teach one of the interpreters how to do the electric slide...Joe, riding his bike behind the truck like a crazy man, or jumping on the back of a garbage trailer and accidentally unhitching it, watching the gator it had been attached to drive away. Mario playing the cowbell like Will Farrell from Saturday Night Live, Shelli-Dawn and Anne coordinating a covert attack on one of our orthopedic surgeons with water guns, all of us learning how to say "open your mouth", "take a deep breath!" in Pashtun, etc etc.

We have had t-shirts made (thanks Brenda!) that say "Afterghanistan Cyprus 2007" to wear when we are on decompression leave next week...I think it will be tons of fun but a big part of me wishes I was on a direct flight straight to Halifax. I can't wait to see my wonderful husband, and my babies who are no longer babies anymore - I can't wait to not have to hear about how Stephen put on his shoes saying he wanted to walk to Gan Tan to see Momma, or to have to tell him I'm not coming home quite yet when he asks on the phone "comin home today, Mommy?".

Not long now, I keep saying...no more meals at the DFAC, no more lineups for the phone, no more dust in my nose. Now that the end is near, I can't wait to get outta this place!

Medals

Had our medals parade yesterday...they were presented by the Commander of Task Force Afghanistan, Brigadier General Grant, and the Surgeon General, Brigadier General Jaeger. It was very cool to be standing out on parade with Chinook helicopters flying over as we received our recognition for the tour. General Grant gave quite a moving speech to say thank you to the hospital staff, and we celebrated after with pizza and beer. Another great memory to bring home!

Back here again...

I have returned to Kandahar Air Field, with a happy Christmas to remember, and I am getting rid of my jetlag ever so slowly. The trip back was just as long and tedious as those previous, however there were a few bonuses this time. I was able to see Amsterdam for a few hours between flights, which was really great, and later had a day and a half to spend with my dear friend Catriona and her family at my next stopover.

Now that I am back, I am ready to come home - we have very few weeks left to go and now the time seems long!! Thank goodness I had the majority of my tour done before I went home on leave.

Things at the hospital have been quiet other than the changing over of the surgical teams, both Canadian and Dutch. We were called in for a Canadian casualty this morning, and it was a not-so-pleasant welcome for me back to business here...this is why we are here, but with five months under my belt, I can say that it doesn't get any easier. The weather is getting nicer again, still pretty chilly at night but during the day it's climbing up to 20C. I can handle this! The bad part is that the dust is getting worse again, because it's been more dry.

The group that was here over Christmas had a good time I guess, with Rick Mercer and Mary Walsh, the band Jonas and Damhnait Doyle here to entertain them, and a visit from the Chief of the Defense Staff as well. There were a lot of great people back in Canada thinking of us over Christmas, and they showered us with care packages and gifts. It took me quite a while to go through the pile of gifts on my bed when I arrived back here!

I have tried to post a couple of photos but I don't seem to be able to do it from here...I will have to fix things up and show some more pics when I get home.

Well, it's just a matter of time now before I leave KAF for the last (at least it better be the last!) time...and it won't be long before you can take down all those yellow ribbons you've been wonderful enough to put on your trees!

Happy to be Home

Hi everyone...I arrived home on December 15th after traveling for a ridiculously long time, but I must say it was worth every minute in my seat on the plane(s)! The fog in Halifax almost kept us from landing and I was looking around for the nearest parachute...luckily my dear Julia brought her magic wand to the airport to meet me and it worked to clear the fog long enough for us to land. I was met at the airport by Robert, Julia, my mom and my Aunt Deirdre and Uncle Ian, as well as a camera guy from CTV, and the footage of me arriving home was on the news that night. Julia ran into my arms, which was a better welcome than I could have hoped for! She stared at me for a long time, as if she couldn't believe it was really me. In the morning, Stephen woke up a little grumpy and after an initial few minutes of shyness he was all over me and wouldn't let me go! I was so relieved that they were both so easy to come home to!

The next night we had a wonderful party with live music - Louis on the guitar and Dave on the fiddle - it was like the Lower Deck in our house! I'm still not sure how I managed to keep myself awake, but I think adrenaline had a lot to do with it...had a great time with so many of our friends and family and it was amazing to see everyone again.

Monday morning Robert and I did another interview with Seamus on Canada AM, which was lots of fun...I am starting to feel like a bit of a celebrity for some reason...I'll give out autographs on request ;-) just kidding, but it's an amazing keepsake to have all these interviews and footage of this experience in our lives.

It is difficult to be here knowing that I have to go back over - I feel like I can't get involved in everything again because it will be that much harder to leave again. Nonetheless it is wonderful to be here, I have thoroughly enjoyed spending Christmas in my house with my family and I feel very lucky.

Must run...I've forgotten what it's like with kids demanding all my attention! Not much time for blogging...

til next time,
Love Lindsay

On the countdown!!!

Hello again everyone...

It is the first week of December, and we have Christmas decorations appearing everywhere in our rooms and at the hospital. All the doors of the rooms in our building have lights around them - usually I find flashing multicoloured lights pretty irritating but for some reason this year I just love them! Christmas will be very special this year. I am very excited to come home for a visit, but oddly enough at the same time feeling a little sad about leaving everyone and everything here over the holidays. It doesn't quite feel real yet that I am leaving KAF soon - a few times it has hit me and the emotion has almost overwhelmed me! I guess it's like any intense feeling, it's difficult to feel it completely...maybe part of it is that I want to save it for when I actually get to the airport in Halifax and see my family. To say that I can't wait is an incredible understatement.

It is a beautiful day outside today - still a bit of chill in the air and the ground is pretty muddy from two days of rain, but the sky is the bluest blue and it is a welcome relief from the cold wet days we've had lately. It's still warm enough to sit out in the sun these nice afternoons, but they're getting fewer and farther between...I'll have to bring some warm clothes back with me in January! Yesterday morning there was ice on the mud puddles, and the windows on the truck were completely frosted over. We found a window scraper finally, so we don't have to use our ID cards anymore :-) It's interesting driving through the camp not really able to see out the windows - the heat/defrost system in the truck doesn't work (did I mention our vehicles are piles of junk?) and when you pile six people inside for the ride, it doesn't take long for everything to fog up. Good thing the speed limit on camp is only 16 km/h...

We have now done over 270 cases in the OR here, with about two months to go in the tour. It feels good to have been here and had four months of experience - trauma is not as scary as it used to be. Don't get me wrong, it's still a bit unnerving to have someone come in with shrapnel through his neck and having a great deal of difficulty breathing, or to see a guy walk in with half his jaw hanging off, covered in blood from head to toe...the crazy things I have seen here will be with me forever!!! It feels bad to say that the worst is seeing the Canadian uniform on one of those stretchers - because the truth is it's hard to see anyone injured and in pain. I guess it just hits a little closer to home. The last ramp ceremony we had was a little different...I can remember standing out there earlier on in our tour and feeling the sweat dripping down my back, barely able to open my eyes because the sun was so bright...on this one I was wishing for gloves because my hands were nearly frozen, especially my right one after holding a salute for so long. But it was a special ramp all the same, for the RSM of the battle group and his driver, and a very sad one for the troops. And the more uncomfortable it is to stand out there on parade, in the heat or cold, the more it feels to me like we are paying our highest respects to these people who have paid the highest price.

One of the medics from the hospital was involved yesterday in a near miss vehicle-borne suicide bomb attack just outside Kandahar City...very frightening and it was extremely lucky that there were no significant injuries. This was the closest to home for us yet...I don't know this medic very well but I gave him a big hug yesterday, feeling very grateful that he is okay.

All this to say I am very much looking forward to getting on that plane to leave this place - but at the same time my thoughts will stay here with everyone who has shared this experience with me. I know there are a lot of people who feel the same way...those who have been here and those who will come after us.

Can't wait to see everyone at home - not long now!!! My love to all of you as always, and can't wait to have a rum n'eggnog (or two or three, what the heck, how about four) when I finally get there.

Bye for now...
Lindsay xoxoxo